from child to woman

a healing has occurred

i am finally  in my body

no longer afraid to stand tall

or wanting to fade into the woodwork

i was over sheltered and practically disabled 

as a child by my mother and grandmother 

growing up in a bubble not believing that 

i was capable of surviving on my own

the shock of jumping into the disfunctional

dangerous world of modeling at the ripe old age of 16                                                                                                  was like throwing an ice cube in boiling water

unable to cope with the armour needed to protect

myself from the unloving environment in which I was exposed to 

the rejection that i endured through my career

left wounds that scarred me 

my inner child never had a chance

to grow up

on the inside, the little girl was lost

and the grown up woman

that i became

didn't know how to be

there was a disconnect

my heart wanted  desperately

to remain sheltered

not fully ready to be an adult

i didn't believe that i could 

do all that i desired

now nearly 3 times the age of 16

i am finally growing up 

ready to be the woman that i am supposed to be

i am taking ownership of my life

empowering myself 

loving myself 

forgiving my past 

learning that all of the pain 

was a part of my process

to connect to my divine purpose

all of my seeming failures

are what make me unique

there is only one of me and it is essential

to learn from my past and to share 

with the world 

my wisdom