Tiffany

Amber
Musk
Opium
Chanel 5
Breakfast at Tiffany’s
The familiar blue box full of beautiful treasures
Lean & strong like a thoroughbred racehorse
High cheekbones like a squaw
With penetrating almond eyes
A smile like she knows all of your innermost secrets
With dimples that punctuate the exclamation
Silky honey brown caramel hair
Spiritual and intuitive in nature
With a soul that has lived a few million years
Nurturing to all who know her
A warrior for her friends and family
Strives for perfection not realizing that she is already enough
And then some!

Bodhichitta

I was a raw open wound, vulnerable to the universe. Exposed and embarrassed
Fragile in my nakedness
Ashamed of my flaws
Automatically trying to hide and protect myself
from the judgements of my peers
Feeling as if it was only I who suffered
They didn't have the same fears or insecurities

So I built a wall, a shield, a coat of arms
Hardening my heart, isolating myself
from the enemy
Retracting from the world
Angry and resentful
full of jealousy and sadness
Alone on my throne
Regretting what could have been
Feeling sorry for myself

Until by the grace of God one day
something changed
My heart broke
something cracked
and my layers melted away
leaving me raw and vulnerable once more
but this time was different
I wasn't able to lie to myself anymore
No more facades
No one was better or worse than the other
We were all just brothers and sisters
struggling through the same race
Wanting the same simple thing
Love

We had all been hurt, lost, disappointed
broken hearted at one time or another
God loves us all equally
Even though it didn't seem like it
Nothing is what it seems
to one person on the other side it looked so
much better over there
I learned to not wish for their life
because no one had it easy
Acceptance, surrendering and compassion
helped me heal my wounds
Sitting in the uncomfortableness of pain
actually letting myself feel my inadequacies
and allowing it to hurt
not running away from the discomfort

Through these cracks in my heart
and my willingness to just be
and not run away but to stay in the awkward moments
I achieved Bodhichitta, a completely open heart

the night is young
i need some fun
trying to stay together
wearing fur and leather
its cold outside and the air smells like winter's coming
had a rough week and my feelings need some numbing
don't want to feel the pain and sorrow
that will have to wait till tomorrow

the night is young
all i really need is to have some fun
just me and my lover
wanting to take cover
from the harshness of the world's troubles
let's go to the pub and make that a double
make me laugh at your jokes
and help me escape the shadows that are following me

Why?

Why?

Why did this happen?

What could we have done to change things?

Empty, lost, angry, alone

Betrayed

Selfish

Senseless

Isolated

Fear

No more family

Shattered

Never to be what it was ever again

Forever pulling at our hearts wondering,

Why?

if only things had been different

If only we had known how bad things really were

Maybe we could have prevented this horrible ending

He was so alone in his despair

Not sharing his fears

Never reaching out for help

Remaining isolated in his misery

Easier to exit voluntarily

Quickly

Without realizing how loved and adored and important he was

to his wife, children, brothers and sisters, his community

Now there is no turning back

Only an unanswered question

Hanging over our heads like a huge dark ominous cloud

Leaving us to constantly wonder

Why?